It took four people 10 days to put the 11,304-pound table together, and it earned official Guinness World Records recognition over the 2011 Father's Day weekend at Marina Green in San Francisco.
It was built with 7,116 feet of Douglas Fir planks and required 1,032 bolts to assemble -- and it took 10 days because it only came with one little Allen wrench for assembly.
Just kidding about that last part... I think.
The previous record holder, a 248-foot-long table assembled in New Orleans in 2009, look positively cozy by comparison.