Most criminals are just not-so-bright people on what is likely to become the worst day of their life. Here's a rundown of your daily loser for the month of January, 2008.
Since 1976, Valerie Ortiz Sanchez of Texas has racked up 76 traffic warrants totaling $18,896 in fines and fees since 1976 just in the town of Harlingen. And that was before her recent arrest on charges of having an expired registration sticker, no insurance and no driver's.
Gregory St. Germain, 24, didn't know what hit him. But we do: Margot Foster of Lighthouse, Fla., a 53-year-old black belt and marathon runner, who chased him for six blocks and held him until police came.
What happens if you commit a crime, only to find you've stumbled upon a bigger crime? Does that make you the good guy?
A 20-year-old man asked courthouse security to mind his marijuana while he appeared before a judge on another matter. He even signed a receipt to confirm the cannabis was his.
While robbing a convenience store, a man from Kokomo shot himself in the coconuts.
Now, this is a guy just begging to be frisked.
Just between you, me, and the drywall compound that this bank robber used as a disguise, he couldn't have been too bright. His getaway car that bore a Rusty Wallace NASCAR plate, and that made the cops' job very easy.
A guy goes into a Waffle House, orders breakfast, then pulls a grenade out of his pocket and sets it on the table. That's one way to get the attention of the waitress.
Police followed a smelly trail of dog feces footprints, and at the end of it, they found the man they arrested on charges of drunken driving.
A 59-year-old unemployed Austrian man faked so many injuries and illnesses that he was able to stay in a total of 93 different hospitals since 2005, authorities said. He may soon be able to sample the food in prison infirmaries.