Most criminals are just not-so-bright people on what is likely to become the worst day of their life. Here's a rundown of your daily loser for April, 2008.
"I just got out of jail. I'm trying to have fun and whoop some ass," said Kevin J. Diaz, 19, according to a complaint, shortly after allegedly attacking a bicycle rider with a 32-inch ice scraper.
Police didn't have to look far to find the man they're accusing of ransacking Boston's Most Precious Blood Church. He was napping inside, just before Sunday services.
A knife-wielding woman chased her husband after she thought she saw him in the porn movie they were watching together.
An 18-year-old allegedly broke into his father's Jacksonville, Fla., home to steal a jar of pennies. Saddest part: The jar contained about $5 in loose change.
Hours after finishing the Boston Marathon, 41-year-old Kim Yong Sik gets arrested after hotel security allegedly stops him from strangling his wife.
Comedian Aries Spears of
MADtv has pleaded guilty in New York to giving a woman's breast a "high five" while performing at New York's Comix club in New York. A judge warned the 32-year-old that he will face 15 days in jail if he harasses another woman during the next 12 months.
The thief who broke into the Azteca restaurant in Kissimmee, Fla., should have check the register before he ran off with it. The 5-foot-9 man in a short-sleeve shirt was caught on surveillance camera, and yes, stealing an empty register is still a crime.
California police reportedly are on the look out for a $250 replica of the bottom half of porn star Jenna Jameson's body that was stolen from an adult store.
April 18: Parolee Allegedly Leaves Meth at Wal-Mart Counter
How's this for a tip: Daniel Santos Ramirex, a 54-year-old parolee allegedly left nine baggies of methamphetamine and his wallet at the counter at Wal-Mart.
