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Buck Wolf

Weird Penis News Roundup: Strange Sex Tales in the Headlines

By January 24, 2011

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Japanese Penis StatueIt's never felt more dangerous to be a man.

Penises are being bitten by rats, chopped right off, shot at, argued about and even (shudder) donated to museums.

There's even a penis snowman in the news... but in keeping with the strangely violent headlines lately, it was torn down.

Or was it just a case of shrinkage?

In case you're having trouble keeping up, here's all the penis news you'll need in one handy (and arousing) post:

  • Penis Snowman Torn Down: A 16-year-old boy erected a 7-foot-tall penis made of snow in his parents' front yard in a Cleveland suburb just to see how people reacted. While many got a rise out of the creation, others were less amused. The police made him tear the penis down, according to the Chronicle-Telegram. Or maybe they were just jealous of its size.
  • Accidental Amputation Leaves Man Without a Penis: A man is suing over a circumcision gone badly wrong. When he woke up, he no longer had a penis. Phillip Seaton says the doc was just supposed to take a little off the top... but chopped the whole thing when he detected cancer. A lawsuit claims the condition was treatable without removal, and that the Seaton wasn't even asked his opinion on the matter. Ouch!
  • Man Removes His Own 'Tiny' Penis: Tired of being teased over a small penis, a man in the Philippines took matters into his own hands. He chopped it off, according to ABS-CBN. He used a bolo, and doctors were not able to reattach the organ. A psychologist says someone needs to keep an eye on the man -- but isn't that what caused the problem in the first place?
  • Court Case Over Penis Rat Bite: An inmate at a Long Island, New York prison received permission to sue Nassau County over an incident in which he says a rat crawled into his cell and bit his penis while he slept. And here I thought that was just the jail's new alarm clocks.
  • Risky Penis-Stretching Device: Officials in Ghana are concerned over a penis-stretching device that looks like something out of a torture museum. It's been banned, and its importers were arrested.
  • Giving the Gift of Penis: Call it the ultimate donation. The Icelandic Phallological Museum, a museum dedicated to penises, was recently given the real McDick A man who promised his organ to the museum 14 years ago died -- and let's just say the offer was finally received.
  • Shot in the Penis: A Kansas City woman was arrested after allegedly shooting her husband in the penis. Neighbors say they heard her shout "If you don't give me my card, I will shoot you," according to KCTV5. He should have given her the card.
  • How Big is Howard Stern's Penis? Six inches, fully erect. The shock jock has always joked about his size, and revealed the magic number to CNN's Piers Morgan during an interview on his new show. Morgan would not rise to the challenge -- he refused to reveal his own size.

Oh, and if you're wondering about that picture, it's from Japan's annual Utamaro Festival, in which comical depictions of penises are paraded through the streets before men women and children. The strange celebration goes back to the 17th century, and it's meant to bless husbands and wives who wish to have children.

Other Weird Penis Tales

Photo © Getty Images

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